adonnelley
Started strong, stuck in radio silence
I was genuinely excited about Function. I’d been saving in my HSA for months to afford this, and I booked a physical with my doctor five weeks out specifically so I’d have my results ready to discuss. It’s now been four weeks waiting on results, and getting a response from support has been impossible. I started with the support chatbot, which told me I could close the tab and they’d follow up by email. No confirmation, no ticket number…nothing. That auto-acknowledgment is industry standard, so I had no way of knowing whether my request reached a human at all. Just silence. I eventually got a single email from a rep saying they saw I didn’t have my results and would “look into it.” That was at the beginning of the week. Nothing since. For a concierge service at this price point, I expected a better. Regular customer updates would be a great upgrade to the service so you’re not just logging in every day, hoping to see results and being disappointed. The worst part: at one point, results appeared in my app and were then removed. Those results flagged some concerning findings. So now I’m sitting here anxiously waiting, with zero support and no answers. I come from the customer support world. I know what it takes to run a support team well, and this is unacceptable. I’d been enthusiastically recommending Function to friends and family and now I’m telling all of them to stay away. I paid a lot of money to spend weeks in anxiety. That’s the opposite of what this service promised.
Response from Function HealthMay 26, 2026
Thanks for letting us know. We’re sorry your experience wasn’t what you expected. We’ve reached out to gather a few more details so we can look into this further. Once we gather the necessary details, we will update our reply here.